The Nobody Chronicles: Chapter Four (part one)

      School dragged on for what seemed like ages, especially because I hadn’t received any sort of response from him and I was beginning to think that Deanna had officially made me look like a major idiot in front of him. Not that I really shoulda expected something, since it wasn’t like he was gonna ditch 5^th and 6^th period to go call his mom so he could text me back about doing costumes for elementary school kids. But whatever, I’ve already made it pretty darn clear that I’m not a very rational person, so I spent the rest of the day feeling slightly sick and checking my phone like I was waiting to win a radio sweepstakes contest.

       Seriously, instead of focusing on American History or Environmental Science or whatever classes I was in after lunch, I kept imagining how he would react to Deanna’s text message. I mean, would he think the winky face was too forward? What if he thought I was strange and he never texted me back? Like, maybe this was all a sick joke and he's gonna just print out my response and post it around school so that everyone can see how pathetically in love with him I am!

      Literally shaking with anxiety about my future with him and pretty much convinced that my one text had ruined any chance I might have, by some miracle, had, I decided to skip rehearsal and just go home. Of course, me ditching rehearsal wasn’t that big of a deal since tech crew didn’t actually have to show up until the week before the show, but I like to go before then because it’s not like I have anything better to do. Besides, it makes me feel sorta special to have somewhere to go after school. You know, like I belong to something that the rest of the student body, rushing off to their cars as soon as the last bell rings, doesn’t get to be a part of? I mean, I guess it’s pretty pathetic cause I mostly just sit in the back of the theatre doing homework or fantasizing about something miraculous happening to me, but the truth is, who really cares.

The Nobody Chronicles: Chapter Three (part six)

          “I guess I’ll just say ‘Ok. Looking forward to hearing from you’ and then like a smiley face or something” I said, typing the message into my phone.

       “This isn’t some sort of business transaction, Miri, no need to sound so official”

       “Fine. What do you think I should say?”

       “Well…you want to be flirty, but not too forward” she said matter-of-factly, taking the phone from my hands and deleting what I had just typed. “How about ‘kk! can’t wait!’ and then a winky face? Winky faces are cute and a little less friendly than a smiley. I mean, you send smilies to your mom.”

       Even though she had phrased it as a question, she hit send before I could disagree. Of course, I couldn’t help but notice that all she had done was essentially typed a dumber version of my original message. Like, I don’t know why, but Deanna has this weird thing about girls being dumber than boys. I mean, it’s not that she‘s actually stupid, but I swear, her IQ drops 200 points whenever a cute guy is around. She says that I’m just being silly, but I’ve noticed it every time we go to a party or whatever. Seriously though, put some hipster, American Apparel wearing hottie in the room and for some reason she feels the need to laugh like she's running for Miss America, and act like she doesn’t know the difference between Napoleon and Neapolitan ice cream.

    Luckily, the bell rang just then and, without another word, I ran off to my next class, a nervous feeling growing in my stomach at what he would respond.

The Nobody Chronicles: Chapter Three (part five)

         “BF wouldn’t be who I think it is would it?”

       I nodded, unable to create a coherent sentence and avoiding the overwhelming urge to jump on the bench and do something in the ballpark of a football touchdown victory dance.

       “NO – FREAKING – WAY!!!!!!” Deanna screamed, pulling me into a giant hug. That was another great thing about Deanna. Like, half the time it was all about her but when she wanted, she really knew how to make me feel special. And not like Warren did either, you know, making me feel special so that I'll fall in love with him and then he can crush me. No, Deanna would make me feel special because of who I am, like special because I’m a nobody. I mean, she actually seemed genuinely happy for me, which of course made me feel crappy for being jealous of her and secretly loving when Warren would flirt with me, or whatever it was that he was doing. But, then again, if this was a fairytale she is the princess perfect and I’m the favorite maid, which even on a good day doesn't end with a happily ever after.

       “It’s really nothing. He just wants me to help out with some thing his mom is running or something.”

       “Umm…That isn’t nothing! That is after school hours with the gorgeous, the unattainable, the irreplaceable Blake Finn!” In her classic actress way, Deanna couldn’t resist the urge to make a scene out of everything she did so, as she spoke, she stood up on the bench, addressing the uncaring crowd and fainting as she finally said his name.

       “SHH!!!” I half-screamed, pulling her back down and looking around to make sure nobody had heard her. “Stop it. I don’t want anyone to know that I like him.”

       Deanna laughed, and I could see that glint in her eye that always sorta scared me, that glint that showed me that she knew she once again had the upper-hand in the friendship. It didn’t bother me that much usually. I mean, I guess she needed that power more than I did, but like, I always wondered why she seemed to light up so much at the thought of being better than me, and what exactly that said about our friendship.

       “So…what are you gonna text him back?”

       “I dunno…haven’t thought about it yet…”

       “Well, just make sure you don’t come off too desperate. Nobody likes desperate. I mean, take Warren. He would never like me if I always hung around him all the time and was like always available to him. I have to act like I don’t care, and that will make him want me more.” 
     I felt it was better not to tell her that she hung on Warren like wet laundry on a clothesline. Truth was, I knew she was right, even though she wasn’t making the point she thought she was making. Warren totally took advantage of her, and I totally didn’t wanna end up doing that with him even though I knew all too well that I would. 

The Nobody Chronicles: Chapter Three (part four)

          Luckily, Warren didn’t follow us, although we could hear his sing-song call from our seat on the bench.

       "Warren sounded pretty jealous" Deanna offered as soon as we had sat down, bringing up the very issue that I had been dreading.

       "Not even!" I said, as if the thought hadn't crossed my mind even though we both knew that it had.

       "Whatever. I don't even care. He isn't good enough for me anyway" She said, laughing and tossing her hair. See, Deanna is the type of girl who loves to do two things. First, she'll insult herself so that you  have to compliment her and then she'll brag about herself so that you have to agree with her. 

       My mom says she has low self-confidence but I don't really believe that. I mean, Deanna is probably the most confident person I have ever met. Half the time I wish I could be just like her. She's like the better version of me. You know, fun, pretty, doesn't let stuff to get to her. Hell! If Warren had treated me the way he treated Deanna I would have been curled up in a ball in my room, sobbing my eyes out, and cursing the day I was born. But not Deanna, she could just keep on smiling, like nothing even mattered.

       “Duh! And besides he was just being stupid, like he always is. I saw how he was all over you before he felt the need to let out his inner eighth-grader and tease me.”

       I could see her smile behind her sandwich and mentally patted myself on the back for being a good friend. I mean, I’m not usually one to brag about myself or anything, but I really am a great friend to the people I care about. Probably has something to do with my need to be loved by everyone and their mother. Oh, and the fact that I care way more about what other people think of me than I think of myself. But, I guess my personality has worse side-effects than being nice to people.

       “His loss I guess. I was gonna let him eat lunch with us, but this is the bench for mature adults, not baboons” She said smiling, but I saw her look over at him with a bit of disappointment in her eyes. It was in these moments that I figured, if I could just see inside Deanna's brain, I would realize that she was just as crazy as I am and was still obsessing about Warren and running the scene through her mind trying to remember every time he touched her and attempting to analyze exactly what he meant by each contact.  Of course, this is all speculation (or probably what Freudians would call projection: because Deanna didn’t show any signs of insane behavior. In fact, instead of dwelling on Warren, she flawlessly turned the conversation on to something else.